I’m a little late to the resolution game this year, which is pretty appropriate as a reflection of 2016. In all honesty, I didn’t follow through on a lot of things I planned to do this year. While some goals were met intermittently, others were completely missed or forgotten about. 2016 was a year of transition and change. Through that transition a lot of wonderful, positive things and changes happened, but some things were also left behind.
I’ve taken some time to reflect on all this.
Overall, 2016 was an amazing year. Although Jack was born in December of 2015, I really came into my own as a mother in 2016. I grew as a person, I developed confidence I have never had, I felt unmatched joy in watching my son grow.
2016 also had it’s challenges, which I’m guessing everyone can relate to. Early on, I went back to work after a short maternity leave. That was one of the most difficult things I have faced, not just in 2016, but in life. I felt tremendous pain and anxiety with leaving my son, and although that faded throughout the year, it hasn’t left me.
2016 was a year of high highs and low lows.
There is a part of me that dislikes the “new year, new me” mentality. If I really want to make changes, if I feel passionately enough, then why didn’t I make changes a month ago? Two months ago? The other part of me still feels hopeful. Hopeful that with a new year comes new opportunities, new intentions. Hopeful that goals will be set, and things that I am doing purposefully become habit. Long lasting habit, not for a few weeks habit.
I know myself enough to know that my good intentions aren’t always enough. Unfortunately, I don’t know myself enough to know what I need to be doing differently to make those intentions enough. So that whole “new year, new me” thing is very inaccurate for me.
Right now, it’s “new year, same old me”. Same old me who may fall short, who may get distracted after a few weeks and go back to old habits. Same old me who is still very hopeful, who has ideals for herself.
When I set my goals for this year and month, I want to be intentional with how I will approach my goals differently. Like I said, I don’t know what I need to be doing differently to make positive change last, but I will build some experimentation into my goal setting.
I’m going to end this post with one small goal. My goal right now is to have my goals planned, written out, and posted within a week of this post being published. I think that will give me adequate time to continue reflecting and come up with a game plan moving forward.
I’m feeling motivated, I just made another cup of coffee, so let’s get to work!